Evansville, Hardesty Hill and Harlaxton Romance

Hello loyal or not-so-loyal-but-very-bored readers, and welcome back to another episode of The Dullest Show on Earth. I got a lot of hate mail about my last entry, especially about Jane Eyre and LOTR, so I guess I have a few (read: 5) readers. I guess people aren't as fiercely loyal to Walden or poetry.

Last Wednesday I decided that I was in dire need of a holiday. (Vacation, for those of you that don't know the British term. I like to use it so I feel better about myself while screaming Lindsey Buckingham's "Holiday Road" in the car). So I packed up Agent Michael Scarn: Threat Level Midnight and took off down to the popular resort town of Evansville, Indiana.


Not sure how I survived that drive. Oh wait, yes I do. gLee songs, Lady Gaga and Queen.

I arrived at the aptly named Fiasco and was promptly bombarded by J.R., Andy, and Chelsey. And a new friend, J.R.'s roommate Taylor. That night was a beautiful blur. I was the winner, staying up the latest out of all of them even after waking up at 7, working til 2 and driving 8 hours. That's just how baller I am. I slept in Ben Deutsch's bed (he wasn't there) and woke up to Courtney and J.R. running in at 11ish. We talked about stupid people at Harlaxton, Courtney left to go to work, and J.R. and I had "pillow talk" for about an hour. Then we fell asleep again. Until 3pm. Yep.

We woke up, got Andy, and went to dinner. While in the car I detailed my amazing flash of inspiration about writing a song about Harlaxton to the tune of "Bad Romance". They loved the idea, so when we got back, while the dishwasher was flooding and JR and I were trying to figure out how to unclog the sink, Andy learned the chords to "Bad Romance" and we made up lyrics. The result will be added when I get to a personal computer.

This was the night that J.R. and I stayed up very late, ingested copious amounts of alcohol, and convinced ourselves that we were the best people in the whole world and EVERYONE should want to be best friends with us. We also watched 5 episodes of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia and called Heather in England -- AND SHE ANSWERED.

The next day was yet another rough morning. J.R. got up at 9 to talk to his landlord about the flooding kitchen and nasty sinks, then went back to bed. I got up at 2, showered, went back to bed, woke up at 4, went and got J.R. and we realized that freaking Mary was going to be there in about 3 hours and we had shit to do. We got up and went to the mall, bought J.R.'s boytoy his birthday present, and I got a REPTAR FLASHDRIVE.

Let that sink in.

When Mary came it was pure bliss. I think I shed a tear. We immediately went to Los Bravos with Drew and Blair, and I did not throw up this time, so it was successful. And absolutely delicious. Then, after a few stops, we headed back to the Fiasco.

Of course we watched a bunch of YouTube videos because that is one of my favorite pasttimes. One in particular is so incredibly amazing . . .






I definitely cried while watching this, and now sing these lyrics instead of the real ones.

The night ended with Apples to Apples and Cramer being hilarious as usual. Suffice it to say it involved Taco Bell and a permanent marker.

The next morning, Mary and I were off to Hardesty Hill in Kentucky-- but not before we went to Drew's family reunion and ate barbecue. Barbecue what, you ask? Just barbecue. Yeah, I don't get it either. But it was delicious. And funny.

Mary and I departed for Hardesty Hill where we spent a delightful evening with Pam, watching Gilmore Girls, having Chris lay all over us on the couch and burp after every episode to remain manly, and randomly bursting into verses of either "Harlaxton Romance" or "Total Eclipse of the Heart."

And then the big kahuna. Kentucky Brunch. Delicious. All kinds of sausage, eggs, potatoes, fruit, biscuits, gravy, HEAVEN. I had to leave right after that, which was sad, but I had so much fun it was worth it.

On the drive home I guzzled three huge Diet Cokes and a large double-caff coffee so . . . I was wired.