- A chastity belt! That's really going to chafe my willy!
- Hey, Blinkin!
- Did you just say Abe Lincoln?
- Hey Abbot!
- I HATE THAT GUY.
- A toll is a toll, and a roll is a roll. And if we don't get no tolls, then we don't get no rolls.
- King illegal forest to pig wild kill in it a is!
- Let's get out of this ladies' clothing and get into our tights.
- I must warn you. It could only be a kiss. For I am a virgin and could never... go all the way. Unless I were married. Or if a man pledged his endless love to me. Or if I knew that he desperately cared for me. Or if he were really cute!
- Don Giovanni, if I may say so, your lizard look limp.
- Well when you get to be my age . . .
- Time out! Sorry bad guys, but I am running out of air. Gotta get pumped.
- King? King? And which King might that be? King Richard? King Louis? King Kong? Larry King?
- Oh, if 'twere you, 'twould be... twerrific!
- From this day forth, all the toilets in the kingdom shall be known as... johns!
- Pissed off? If I was that close to a horse's wiener I'd be worrying about being pissed on!
- No, we're straight. Just . . . Merry.
- This means you've always been my one true love because it's just the right size!
- It's not the size that counts! It's how you use it!
- This old man is Locksley.
- Are you sure? He looks like Mark Twain.
- Wasn't your... didn't your mole used to be on the other side?
- I have a MOLE?
- D-E-D. Dead.
- You are very brave for not a homeboy.
Am I supposed to guess or is this just to make me wish I actually owned Robin Hood : Men In Tights? I thought I did until age 14, I then realized it was actually my friends - I couldn't convince her to give it too me, my persuasive skills have never been very good.
ReplyDelete- Ninny